Texts From Last Night

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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.

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  (920): i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth. http://tfl.nu/8x3w
  Replies (58) Good night (901) Bad night (2899)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life

  (619): View more from California

  with a huge shlong

  (440): View more from Ohio

  massive. i wanna make bitches cry

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  (440): if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life (619): with a huge shlong (440): massive. i wanna make bitches cry http://tfl.nu/imk4
  Replies (39) Good night (5958) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You did not just nickname me "Nipples".

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  (847): You did not just nickname me "Nipples". http://tfl.nu/cizi
  Replies (22) Good night (3835) Bad night (1534)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Get out now.

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  (301): If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me? (513): Get out now. http://tfl.nu/w3kk
  Replies (57) Good night (8395) Bad night (2783)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?

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  (616): Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past. (616): I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures? http://tfl.nu/o51k
  Replies (4) Good night (3078) Bad night (1516)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.

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  (253): So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel. http://tfl.nu/ldso
  Replies (5) Good night (1086) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.

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  (305): You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos. http://tfl.nu/9yd3
  Replies (5) Good night (744) Bad night (1399)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with

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  (727): Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with http://tfl.nu/m05i
  Replies (11) Good night (741) Bad night (1902)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next

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  (850): She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next http://tfl.nu/slhn
  Replies (10) Good night (3759) Bad night (620)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.

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  (423): I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick. http://tfl.nu/4wtf
  Replies (7) Good night (696) Bad night (1389)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk

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  (908): I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk http://tfl.nu/wvk1
  Replies (6) Good night (602) Bad night (926)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.

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  (816): He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken. http://tfl.nu/2q6x
  Replies (1) Good night (861) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.

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  (757): She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night. http://tfl.nu/eco5
  Replies (8) Good night (514) Bad night (1510)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!

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  (330): It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink! http://tfl.nu/ur99
  Replies (2) Good night (370) Bad night (553)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.

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  (570): your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night. http://tfl.nu/sxe1
  Replies (2) Good night (294) Bad night (478)

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