you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
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If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
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How's your threesome situation going?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.