your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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