I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize