I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
