On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
That accounts for only three of the penises
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
