after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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