And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
