Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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