I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
