Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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