i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize