...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Randomize
