I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
