Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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