Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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