Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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