No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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