but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
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