eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize