whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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