I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
