she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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