I wanna bring you to show and tell
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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