it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
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3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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