Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
