So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
