This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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