Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Randomize
