Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize