I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
