I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
