Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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