Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
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If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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