You made me cry and you don't even care
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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