We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
