my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize