I think scott just propositioned me for sex
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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