I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize