You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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