Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
