you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
