I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Non-Jews are for practice
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
