Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize