found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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