it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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