at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize