I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
