doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
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