Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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