it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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