Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
